Caitlin Doughty is a mortician. She runs her own mortuary in Los Angeles. This book is her answer to the numerous questions that she has received from people (mostly kids) about what happens to your body after you die. This is short and Ms. Doughty has a very matter of fact, and funny, writing style geared toward accurately answering the questions without tip toeing around the grosser aspects of body preparation. I listened to this on audiobook and the author narrates the text. I enjoyed hearing the author’s playful tone while dealing with serious subject matter. I learned a great many things (your cat will probably start with your eyelids and lips before eating your eyeballs, you can’t have a burning boat funeral because the boat will burn before the body does, just to name two) and found myself saying “I didn’t know that” quite a lot. If you or your kid has any questions about the care of bodies after death, then this has lots of good information.
I want to get one thing out of the way right at the top of this review: I could not get over the fact that the main character (Amy) didn’t demand that her husband, who left her and their two children for three years, pay child support and even worse that he didn’t just pay without being asked. Every time she talked about how hard she had struggled financially during her husband’s 3 year absence I just wanted to shout— divorce him! Get a child support order!
Other than that I really found this to be a delightful and thoughtful romance revolving around Amy’s summer in New York following her husband’s unexpected return to their childrens’ lives. He feels guilty and wants to reconnect with his kids and Amy, eventually, agrees to let him take care of them for a summer while she house sits for a friend in New York. Part of my enjoyment of this book is that Amy and her eventual love interest, Daniel, are both deeply nerdy librarians and I can appreciate that on a visceral level.
Most of the novel revolves around Amy’s desire to enjoy her pseudo single life after years of doing nothing but taking care of her two children (ages 15 and 12 at the start of the book) and working and her guilt about enjoying a life that doesn’t revolve around her children. Amy and Daniel are both thoughtful adults who think about their relationship and seriously consider each other’s feelings and the needs of their children (Daniel is also a single dad.) Amy’s estranged husband manages to redeem himself in the fatherhood arena, though Amy is still the most competent parent.
This was a very adult but also fun romance that addresses issues of gender inequality, particularly where motherhood and parenting is involved, in a forthright way. It also acknowledges differences in class and privilege. One ongoing theme in the book is Amy’s pilot reading program that she has been able to roll out in the small, wealthy, private school where she teaches and the problems tied to privilege, class and money that are a barrier in expanding the program to public schools and poor students. The book doesn’t ignore those barriers and shows Amy and other ancillary characters working to find funds for the program. This is a romance, so not only do they find the funding, Amy also gets her Happily Ever After.
This book was beautiful. The writing is heart rending and evokes the angst and obsession of the teenaged Vanessa, and then the traumatized adult Vanessa. This is the story of a 15 year old girl that is groomed and then sexually abused by her middle aged English teacher at an exclusive boarding school. For the teenaged Vanessa, her relationship with Mr. Strane is a love story. She is special and precious and of course she wants this man to pay attention to her and tell her that her hair reminds him of autumn leaves. She loves him and he loves her and she is so, so sincere. For the adult Vanessa, things are much more complicated. The author manages to show in minute detail the many ways that Vanessa’s trauma is expressed.
Also on display are the numerous ways that Strane manipulates Vanessa while still telling the story from her perspective. Strane is an awful, conniving abuser who uses every emotionally and sometimes physically abusive tactic to control Vanessa well into adulthood. This story is complicated and frustrating but it is also propulsive. I wanted, alternately, to hug and shake Vanessa throughout the book.
A little side note— Vanessa makes a literary comparison in the text so compelling that it has caused me to order a copy of Lolita so I can reread it alongside Titus Andronicus.
I Am Enough 